While searching for love in the bustling city environment, aspiring Romeos often lack the ideal tools for initiating conversations with potential partners.
At times, they must think on their feet and adapt to the situation.
Even if it entails approaching a stranger at a bar and assuming the role of a feline.
Barrett (Center) underscores the significance of incorporating improvisational comedy principles for New York City clients striving to find their life partners. Stefano Giovannini
“I recently guided my client Alex to approach a lady at a lounge and commence meowing,” shared NYC dating coach Connell Barrett, 52, with The Post. “The lady’s face lit up, she chuckled — she might have found it peculiar, but in a positive way.”
“Alex was enjoying himself,” Barrett, the founder of Dating Transformation, a service dedicated to matching soulmates, added. “Engaging in playful improvisation is the secret weapon to enhancing one’s dating skills.”
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In a competitive urban setting, individuals navigating the city solo might benefit from embracing his theatrical guidance.
“Improvisation is particularly beneficial for assertive individuals to break free from overthinking and embrace the excitement of meeting someone new,” he explained. “Approximately 90% of the time, my clients depart with a woman’s contact information or a scheduled date.”
— though not resembling Will Smith’s fictional love guru in the 2005 romantic comedy — Barrett counsels clueless gentlemen on leveraging improvisational comedy techniques, mentored by acting coach Patrick McCartney, to attract romantic interests.
Barrett has earned the moniker of the real-life “Hitch” due to his adept advice on wooing “Mrs. Right.” Stefano Giovannini
McCartney, who has collaborated with renowned comedians such as Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, mentioned to The Post how improv has empowered shy individuals to exude charisma and charm.
“It facilitates connections through amusement and joy,” stated the seasoned performer from the esteemed Second City comedy club. “It has enabled many of Barrett’s clients to relax and cease overanalyzing every interaction.”
For a fee ranging from \(3,000 to \)12,000, tailored to each novice romantic’s requirements and financial capacity, this Manhattan-based matchmaker takes socially awkward singles under his wing for an eight-week course in the art of courtship. Men opting for the more economical option receive personalized dating insights through individual phone and Zoom consultations, while those willing to invest more benefit from in-person coaching sessions.
Irrespective of the fee paid by the students, Barrett imparts valuable lessons to each participant — often professionals like doctors and engineers aged 20 to 75 — on the engaging advantages of improv techniques such as “Yes, And” and “Mind Meld.”
These linguistic exercises encourage reserved individuals to shed their inhibitions and embrace a more playful demeanor.
“These activities can refine a man’s cleverness, enhance their attentive listening skills, and enable them to delve deeper into understanding a potential partner beyond the customary first-date inquiries,” explained McCartney.
Subsequently, they evaluate the students’ newfound skills in practical scenarios.
The duo frequently accompanies small groups of learners to popular venues like Barnes & Noble in Union Square or the rooftop lounge on Lexington Avenue for interactive “wingman weekends.”
During these weekend excursions, Barrett motivates his proteges to engage in improv exercises while approaching women at coffee shops, lounges, and bars. Stefano Giovannini
Throughout the intensive two-day sessions, Barrett assigns each man quirky improv challenges like “Approach that woman pretending to be a pirate,” or “Act like a waiter and suggest the breakfast specials.”
Those hesitant to complete a task are presented with a playful ultimatum.
“I jokingly say, ‘You either stride over there confidently, or I’ll escort you in a headlock,’” Barrett chuckled.
Etienne, 24, embraced the dating challenge during one of Barrett’s wingman weekends in August.
Shortly after practicing various theatrical strategies, such as dancing exuberantly in Washington Square Park and sharing his most embarrassing anecdote with strangers, the timid Brooklyn resident informed The Post that he felt prepared for action.
“I spotted a charming lady at a coffee shop, initiated a conversation with a ‘Yes, And’ approach, and invited her for a date,” recounted Etienne, a home-tech product developer from Fort Greene.
This Gen Z individual attributes his blossoming romantic connection to the coaches’ lessons in spontaneous playfulness.
Barrett’s client Drayton utilized his improv skills to strike up a lively conversation with a woman at the bar last Saturday. Stefano Giovannini
“Improv alleviates the pressure when interacting with women,” shared Etienne, who opted to withhold his surname for privacy reasons.
“I no longer fret about making mistakes or missteps, I feel more self-assured and liberated,” he expressed.
“Engaging in dating with improv is far less stressful. Now, I’m genuinely enjoying the experience.”