DEAR ABBY: Recently, I received a diagnosis of a progressive illness without a cure. This condition will gradually impact both my physical and mental well-being as I age. While I am currently focused on symptom management to minimize the effects on my daily life, this unexpected turn of events is not how I envisioned my later years.
Although I have confided in close family and friends about my health status, I have chosen to approach each day with as much positivity as possible, without fixating on the future health challenges that await. However, I am encountering a recurring issue with some loved ones who persistently inquire about my condition. While I am not in denial, I prefer not to constantly discuss or dwell on my illness during the good days I still enjoy. I know that the disease will progressively dominate my life in the near future.
I am struggling to convey my need for privacy regarding my health without causing offense to those who care about me. As the symptoms become more apparent, I anticipate this challenge will only intensify.
— GOOD FOR NOW IN MICHIGAN
DEAR GOOD: It is understandable that you wish to live in the present and not be consumed by discussions about your health. You are entitled to privacy and the freedom to address your illness on your own terms. I suggest politely informing these individuals that you would prefer not to delve into details about your condition unless you initiate the conversation. Your well-being should not be a topic for casual discussion without your consent. If some individuals are taken aback by your stance, it is a small price to pay for your peace of mind.
DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend recently started his college journey, and we have been in a relationship for about a year and a half. Despite the proximity, his mother has imposed restrictions on the frequency of our visits. Whenever I travel to see him, I cover the expenses for my train tickets. I fail to see how my visits inconvenience her in any significant manner. While we respect her wishes, maintaining a relationship with limited face-to-face interaction poses its challenges. Although he returns home during breaks and weekends, I believe that the decision to see each other should not be solely dictated by her. How can I address this issue with her without appearing disrespectful?
— THREE IS A CROWD
DEAR THREE: Your boyfriend’s mother likely wants to ensure that he remains focused on his studies with minimal distractions. She may also be concerned about the potential consequences of intimacy at this stage in your relationship. It would be wise to refrain from directly confronting her about this matter. If you find the visitation restrictions burdensome, your boyfriend should be the one to discuss this with his mother.